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Cutting The Ties That Bind [24 Oct 2004|01:15am] [ mood | infuriated ] ------ Non Journal Entry ------ The door to the rather large very expensive house opened and the man dressed in his clean, crisp black suit stepped through from the outside. His fingers  removed his coat and he tossed his keys into the bowl on the nearby table. He yawned before he ran a hand through his slick black hair. He seemed to check his  mail, seemingly unaware that eyes watched him from the shadows. This man had no sixth sense, if he had, he would have noticed that a person lurked in one of the corners of his house. Using the shadows as a cloak, waiting for their moment to strike. As the man turned, the one waiting in the shadows moved forward and an arm wrapped around the man's neck. The man fought briefly but a low voice soon  hissed in his ear. " Missed me, Alberto?" The voice was so unlike its usual self. It sent shivers down Alberto's spine and caused him to stop fighting. He swallowed  hard and tried to focus his eyes on the other man. The arm across his neck tightened before Alberto was pushed forward and flung into the nearby couch. As he turned on the black leather, he gasped when his eyes fell on Joseph. His right eye was bleeding, his cheeks were cut and he had obviously lost a lot of blood from an injury to his side. Black marks marred his skin and in several  places he had angry looking burns and bruises. His clothes were cut up and his hair was streaked with dirt and it would seem he had several gashes across his  hands and over his thighs. Joseph's holster remained around his shoulders and the guns glistened despite the state of their owner. " Joseph.." Alberto began before he let out a short cry as Joseph wrapped his hand around Alberto's shirt and yanked him up off the couch so the both of them  were mere inches apart." I had to.." He tried to explain but Joseph wasn't listening and this was clear by how he hauled Alberto off the couch and flung him  towards the glass table that stood in the middle of the floor. Alberto let out a sharp cry as the glass table shattered beneath his sudden weight and his back met the floor. A few shards now stuck out in his arms and he winced before he moved his shaking fingers to remove them." Just stop for one minute and listen to  me." Joseph merely arched an eyebrow at that. He muttered something in Italian, it was insulting and very demeaning to the man lying within the circle of glass. He  refused to speak any words in English to this man, he was beyond angry. He was furious. He now kicked Alberto across the face. The satisfying sound of  something breaking brought a grin to Joseph's face. Alberto groaned as he rolled to the side and his blood gushed towards the ground. Joseph wasn't willing to talk, he wasn't willing to negotiate and he was certainly not willing to play nice. This man had threatened his mother, lied to him and had  used him to get what he wanted. Retribution would be taken but it would be slow and it would be painful. Joseph lifted his boot and he rested it against Alberto's  side before he forced the other to his back and Joseph placed his feet on either side of Alberto. His boots crunched against the shards of glass and his hand  moved down to wrap around Alberto's shirt. He lifted him only to force him back to the ground. The other man's skull made a horrid sound as it impacted against  the ground. " Where is she?" He asked as he paused for a moment. He slapped Alberto's face to make the other focus his attention on him. His one dark eye glinted in the dim  lighting and his voice held a trace of contempt as he spoke to Alberto. Alberto's eyes were wide and filled with fear. It was a good thing he was the big bossman's  son or else the world would have eaten him alive. Joseph had seen it happen to others." I'll say this one more time. Where is she?" ( Beating The Truth Out Of Him ) ( Happy Now? ) Alberto lifted the corner of his lips." Did I hit a nerve?" He was absolutely petrified and he didn't want to die but he was trying with everything inside of him to  keep a straight face, to not show his fear. Joseph's eyebrow twitched and he simply pulled the gun back. Alberto had an imprint of the muzzle and a dark bruise was already forming and then without  much warning, Joseph snapped the gun across the side of Alberto's face and effectively knocked the other unconscious. He watched as Alberto fell to a heap at  his ground and he shook his head. He walked back to where his gun lay and he leaned down to snatch up before he walked straight out of the house. He turned his back on this life once more. reply

Many Happy Returns.. or something [24 Oct 2004|05:11am] [ mood | awake ] [ music | Dirty Vegas - Days Go By (Accoustic) ] So, Matthew came and got his bike.. leaving me with that monster that Jo calls a truck. Yeah, I know. She bought it from my shop, I did most of the modifications to it myself. I think everyone is happy to have their own wheels back, I know I'd go nuts without my bike. I've been studying my brains out with the deomonolgy shit that Michie keeps dumping on me, and wondering where in the hell my absentee Slayer roomie Gwen is. I need to go visit Dawn and see how she's doing. If she's feeling up to it, I think a spar with her could be fun. Patrolling is turning up virtually nothing. Of course, I guess it would help if I went a little further out. I'm definitely curious about the church with its boarded up windows. I think I might head inside there sometime and see what their preacher is all about. I've heard it's a very young woman. There's also a blonde female vamp hanging around, I keep seeing her skulking and hunting the locals. I wonder if she's that one that the Watcher was trying to warn people about. Maybe I'll see if I can't catch up with her one of these nights. Yeah. reply

Sotto Voce [24 Oct 2004|04:25pm] Joseph wandered the halls of the airport. His plane wasn't due to take off for another hour or so, so he had some time and he knew there was only one person he wanted to talk to. His eyes were covered by shades and his body was wrapped with bandages and his brown skin had a slight green and yellow tint from all the bruises on it. He paused beside a wall, bending slightly at the waist so he could rest his bag down against the floor before he straightened his back and he moved over towards the wall. He rested his shoulders solidly against the wall. Exhaling a harsh breath at the sharp pain through his shoulderblades before he rummaged out his phone. He flipped it open and dialled the number before he pressed it to his ear and he drummed his fingers against his denim clad thigh. After her hunt the night before, Rhiannon had come back to her apartment and collapsed on the bed, finally able to get some measure of rest. Joseph still weighed heavily on her mind and in her dreams, however. She'd woken early and climbed in the shower, letting the hot water pull some of the tension from her muscles, particularly the tightened ones beneath her navel. After a bit, Rhiannon pulled back the shower curtain and reached up to squeeze the water from her hair. As she reached for a towel, her cell phone began to ring from the bedroom. Hurriedly, she wrapped the towel around her torso and dashed towards her night stand, dripping all over the carpet. "Hello?" "Hey you." Joseph commented casually down the phone. A brief smile curled his lips upwards. The first genuine one in a while that was for sure. He crouched for a moment before he exhaled a slow breath. Moving seemed to take a lot of effort. Joseph balanced the phone between his ear and his elbow. Where were the tickets? He rummaged through other pockets as he looked for his tickets. He also needed a cigarette and he was sure he had bought a packet. Rhiannon ran her hand through her hair and exhaled a deep breath. It felt like she'd been holding it for days, ever since he'd told her he was leaving. For a moment, she didn't say anything. She simply sat on the edge of the bed and closed her eyes, letting relief wash over her. With a hand clutching the towel to her body, she let herself say his name. "Joseph... You have no idea how good it is to hear your voice." ( Now That I'm Different ) reply

...in love [24 Oct 2004|06:31pm] [ mood | anxious ] So...I'm in love with her, and she's in love with me. //firewalled against everyone// Good fucking christ. I really don't remember feeling this happy, this content, while at the same time being so fucking terrified that I'm having problems breathing. She's asleep. Pills. I'm half wishing for unconciousness myself but at the same time I want to just lay here and watch her. is that creepy, stalker like behavior? My thoughts are reeling. Like, do I deserve this? Her? To feel this way? Does it matter if I deserve it? People, I've learned, flat out don't get what they deserve. What I deserve is debatable and lies somewhere between being flayed alive every day in hell and just being dragged out into the street and lynched, mob style. Yet I've got her. Right here, in my arms. She smells nice. She's warm and comfortable and we seem to fit. This is scary. It all happened so fast...maybe it was...meant to be? That sounds so stupid. I was expecting the 'jesus I can't lose her' feeling to come later, but I can see the popped stitches on her, since her shirt rode up in her sleep, and...I almost did already. If it had been just a little more... She'd be gone and I know I'd be devistated. Even before she'd told me...that she loves me. So now that she has told me? That it's all official and all that shit? Yeah. No losing her. I'll hold on with everything I've got, and I pity anything that tries to get in the way. And maybe that's even more creepy obsessive stalkerish and everything but I can't help it. Seriously. I'll tear through anything trying to keep me from her. So nothing better try. I'll have their fucking head. Then of course there's that black mark on my record that I'm going to have to hide. I just...I don't think I could hack seeing her eyes after that. If she knew. So I'm back to hoping she never finds out. I just have to...I don't know. Hope I don't talk in my sleep. I love that sound. That little sigh sound she makes, usually when she's shifting in her sleep, cuddling in further to me. I'm such a fucking pathetic sap. When did that happen?? And now she's shifted into me and...she's injured, goddamnit. I just want to...touch her. I haven't actively wanted to do that with anyone in so long. My first experience with that, well 'it fucking sucked' isn't strong enough a description. Kind of makes a guy shy. But with her I actually want to again. And of course our timing blows and none of that is going to be going on until she's better. ...grr. Just grr. I want to so bad. I forsee cold showers in my future. I can't hurt her. I just can't. ....oh god. Is she....a virgin? Shit. Fuck. Goddamnit. I hope not. I mean, I hope so but I hope not and...that'll hurt her. Shit. I can't hurt her...fuck. I'm a little overwhelmed. This happned so fast. Is it supposed to happen this fast? Is this what they talk about when they ramble on about love at first sight? Or at least love at almost-first-sight. I don't know, even thinking back, I wasn't so...guarded around her. Maybe I just recognized in her a kinship. I don't know. I'm back to sounding stupid. I wasn't even sure I still believed in love anymore until now. Aparently I do. *sigh* I used to be steady and strong and focused, a champion in my own right (or trying to be), and now...I'm hers. Just hers. I'm still those other things now too, but...yeah. Hers. //end firewall// oh yeah. I'm just a little on a high here, so be warned, all. Minimum safe distance might be a good idea. reply

So, all official-like: [24 Oct 2004|11:41pm] [ mood | bouncy ] [ music | Counting Crows-Accidentally In Love ] It's strange, I'm still sore and yet I couldn't feel better. I suppose that doesn't make sense, but then it doesn't have to except to me. It's my journal, after all. At least misunderstandings have been cleared up, declarations of love made and several days spent cooped up and shamelessly enjoying that high. We both needed it and I don't mind being selfish when it comes to laying claim and making sure I'm not the only one spending sufficient time healing up. We'll need it...for more reasons than one. //firewalled against everyone// All the times I made fun of Buffy and her relationships are coming back to haunt me right now. Of course I still feel some of that's justified, but now I can't get her back with the 'I'm not dating, so I can make fun of everyone who is' line. It's not like I never dated, I have. Just nothing serious. Seeing the horrible angst Buffy went through with Angel for starters just made me want to avoid that entirely. What on earth could be worth that much pain? And of course now I'm in love with Angel's son. I'm sure some god out there is laughing at me, but I don't care. Connor's not Angel and this isn't some angst-o-rama. Or at least it wasn't after we cleared things up. ...gods, I can't believe the first time I said I loved him, it was during a medicated haze that I barely remember! That alone makes me want to bang my head against a wall or something but no need to repeat Connor's tactic of self-injury. Still, I doubt I'll ever get over that. Or seeing the look in his eyes when he mistook me. Well, I'll be all too eager to repeat what I said as many times as he needs it. Just as long as he doesn't go punching any more trees and not telling me his hand's injured. This has all happened so fast but I don't care. I've seen enough to know that time doesn't always matter when it comes to just knowing certain things. Such as how I feel when I'm around him, knowing that he just gets me on a level no one else does. Not even Buffy. Was it love at first sight? I don't think it happened that fast, but even so it seemed there wasn't any barrier between us to breach like there is with almost everyone else I meet. It's a relief for those instincts to be right and know that for whatever reason karma's been nice to me lately, bestowing a boyfriend who I don't have to edit anything from and is a complete sweetheart even if I'm the only one who sees that. I don't mind, it's nice to see a side of him no one else does. Yeah, so he's very protective but I think that's adorable. Even if it means more badass points down the drain. Now that I think on it, maybe my fourteen year old self is laughing at me too. Here I blush to think about the entries I made back then and I'm gushing worse than I ever did back in my worst spaz days. At least Connor's not here at the moment to ask what I'm blushing over, must've gone out to take care of that hand or at least I hope so. I might go out myself but doubt that will be for long. I've become far too addicted to my human pillow though I certainly won't complain. Too bad I'm still a bit too sore for more than that, though hopefully it won't be that long. I wonder if I should tell him that....we'll get to that later. In the meantime, there's frustration but oh well, I'll deal with it. I know from experience life can be a lot worse and I'm going to enjoy every second I can now. //end firewall// Hm, time to do something about that stir-crazy feeling. Off for a walk, I need to get some fresh air and stretch these legs a bit, give the house ghosts some time to themselves and such. And after I get back, there are a few things I need to take care of... reply

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